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19 on the 21st of April

This won't stop till I say so

19 days ago - 2,700 views
This won't stop till I say so
Previous story: http://www.polyvore.com/life_has_funny_way_helping/set?id=41130097
Short summary: Mariam (Karlie, I changed her model) is pretty new to LPP. Her older sister Isabella (Miranda) already graduated there the year before and lives in London with her fiancé Greg. She was with his brother Jason before. Now Bella is back to visit Mari and tries to flirt with David, who's totally in love with Mariam. Mari isn't ought to know that, though.
 

Mariam:
"I mean, why don't you take a room in hotel nearby if you want to visit me? I don't have enough time to show you around here!", I exclaimed as Bella followed me to my room.
 
"What's the problem, Mari? I can take care of myself. Plus, I know the campus and already met some of your friends. And it's the weekend so I can accompany you to the events. Wouldn't that be awesome?", she cheered and sat down on my bed. "Your roommate is gone for the weekend so there's enough space for the two of us. Like in the old times!"
 
"I saw that you already made friends", I snapped turning my back to her. "Like always", I added, my voice low.
 
"Come on, Mariam. Let's get to bed. I don't know what's up with you, really. I just wanted to surprise you. And to me it seems like you don't want to talk about it, so we'll speak tomorrow. I'm exhausted from the flight, anyway."
 
Before I could answer, she already layed down on the bed and fell asleep. I stared out of the window and sighed. She was so complicated sometimes. Or maybe it was me. Bella had always been the gorgeous one, the real bombshell who pretended to not notice it. Sure, she had had difficult times, but after the things I'd heard, I wasn't sure anymore whether she caused the trouble herself. She and Greg were perfect for each other and now she wanted to feel wanted again? I didn't get it and, truth be told, I didn't care.
The I thought about David. I would have never guessed that he loved me. He was the guy each girl would want and I was definitely not the equivalent girl for him. But he had refused Bella! I shook my head and tried to sleep. That was too much for me.
 
"Get up, girl!", Bella awakened me roughly. "The sun is up and I don't want to spend the day inside because of you. The garden party will be amazing! So put that outfit on and come with me!"
She was already fully dressed in a creamy dress mad of lace. Every other girl, or better me, would have looked like a fat cow in it. But Bella just looked like a model. Her smile was open and wide. Then my eyes caught her hand.
 
"Where's your engagement ring?", I asked confused.
 
"Oh, it's too big. I needed to put it away because I'm afraid to lose it", she shrugged it off. "Just imagine that!"
 
I jumped into the outfit which, I had to admit, was awesome. Bella had an eye fro things like that. But still, I stood in her shadow. Right as I thought this, somebody knocked at the door.
 
"Ladies? Are you up?" It was David!
 
"Sure, darling!", Bella answered and opened the door for him. Before he could even see me, she hugged him tightly. "I'm so excited for the day, it's like I would attend university again", she laughed and clanged to his arm. "Do you want to take me outside?"
Of course he couldn't refuse and smiled back. But then he remembered me.
 
"Uhm, Mari, do you want to come with us? Or aren't you ready yet?"
 
"You can go now", I stuttered, and blushed. "You don't need to wait for /me/."
David wanted to say something else, but Bella interrupted him. "Let's meet your gorgeous friends, Dave!"
And she nearly pushed him out of the door. I could only hear her laughter. I sat down on my bed and inhaled deeply. That couldn't be true! My own, beloved sister couldn't be such a b.itch! But it seemed like she was. And I couldn't think of anything to keep her away form David. Or Dave, who she called him, I thought sourly.
 
When I walked to the meadow where the little party should start, I was ready to fight. And then I saw the two of them. Bella leaned at his knees and told his friends something which had to be absolutely hilarious. All of them were ready to get her something to drink or to eat. And David? He seemed to enjoy it.
 
"May I sit down here?", I asked shyly.
 
"Mariam! How great you finally made it!", Bella meant. "Guys, this is my little sister Mariam."
The boys looked at me but turned away instantly to listen to one of Bella's stories. Only David seemed to get uncomfortable, but he didn't stand up or anything. Instead, he pointed at the place next to him.
 
"Want to join us?", he grinned. And this guy had said he loved me? Liar! I was sure that it was just some trick to get Bella even more excited about him. I sat down anyway and sipped my lemonade while I listened to Bella.
 
"Oh, it was such a great time! You should enjoy your college life, really! I would love to come back again, just to have that much fun like you must have", she laughed.
"You should, please!", one of the boys said and the others nodded.
"We didn't have such hot guys like you here back then, so it would be even better", she flirted shamelessly.
 
"I heard different things form you", I said, but nobody noticed it except for David. He raised his eyebrows. Bella had noticed his behavior, too, and she leaned even closer towards him.
 
"Who wants to go to the buffet with me? Dave?", she asked and grabbed his hand while she stood up elegantly. "Mari can entertain while I'm away." David followed her like a sheep while I sat there, still and about to cry.
 

Isabella:
"This day is so beautiful, David! Just look at the flowers, listen to the birds...", I said and took his hand.
 
"You two are so different, I can't believe you're sisters", he meant. "I mean, you always say what you think and Mari is too shy to say anything. I don't know what she thinks about me... what she feels for me."
 
"Dave, I'm sorry. But I think she isn't ready yet. And she will never be ready for a boy like you. You could never be happy together."
 
"Are you happy with Greg?", he wanted to know while we sat down under some trees. I'd guided him towards that place, exactly into the opposite direction of the buffet.
 
"Most of the time, yes. But sometimes, I need an adventure. And I'm afraid that I found someone who... who makes me feel different again. Younger."
 
"You're only 23", Dave grinned. "That's not old at all. And just 4 years older than me."
 
"Do you really think so? It is isn't a problem for you?", I whispered. Before he could answer, I started to kiss him. And this time, he didn't refuse to kiss me back. I could feel his hunger and that he was desperate and confused. Just the right mood he should be in.
 
"Oh", I sighed and moved onto his lap without stopping to kiss him. He breathed heavier and put his hands into my open hair.
I unbuttoned his shirt and touched his hard abs while he pulled off my dress. I wasn't afraid that anyone could see us, we where to far away from the actual party. And I could feel that he didn't care about Mari at all right now while I moved faster. Maybe it was good he wasn't with her. She could never take all of his lust, she was too scared. Plus. she would never know about it. I would be away on Tuesday. We would have three dads for our secret. Three days we needed to use.
 
"Dave, you know what to do", I mumbled into his ear and I could feel that a smile spread across his face. "Do you want to show your room to me? Or aren't you afraid of being seen?"
 
"No, Bella. But if you are....", he trailed off and I couldn't focus on what I wanted to respond for a few seconds while his lips moved down my neck.
 
"I think this makes it even better", I explained and moved his hand to where I wanted it to be. I moved away quickly so he could stand up and take off his pants.
 
"Wow", I breathed and stared. I didn't care that he was younger than me or that I was engaged. I examined him and I could feel was happiness. Then I could see how his eyes grew wider.
"You're not wearing any underwear!"
 
"Of course I'm not. It's too hot anyway", I smiled seductively. "I... I hoped for something like this. When I first saw you, I knew that we were made for this."
 
"Come on, I want to be closer to you", he said in a deeper voice. I licked my lips and grinned.
"I'm waiting for you." Greg would never do something like this,. he would be too scared of being caught.
 
In this moment, I forgot about anything else. I could only think about David and what he did to me. Maybe the shame would come later on, but I doubted it. How could I feel any shame for something I needed so badly? I looked into David's eyes and could read the same thoughts in them. And then I couldn't think about anything else.
 

@kepari @daisie-xo @emilie-ethereal and @luxecouture because you commented on the previous story and I hope you want to know how it goes on.
17 comments

THANK YOU!!

19 days ago - 2,611 views
THANK YOU!!
This set is for all of the people who created a birthday set for me. I love all of the sets from the bottom of my heart. They are individual, different and gorgeous, just like you are!
 
You can take a look at the sets here:
http://www.polyvore.com/sets_for_my_19th_birthday/collection?id=1482228
 
So, thank you for the beautiful gifts! I know it took you a lot of time to make them and that you really though about them so I appreciate that:)
I am really sorry that I can't create a set for each of you:( It's just not possible because of time.
I love you!:)
 
@netty
@ts-alex
@stylistish
@jpcarroll
@rikka-alethea
@akafashionqueen
@dora04
@iloveyoudd
@luxecouture
@color-me-red
@fantasy-rose
@rainie-minnie
@just-lala
@punkybaby
@claire-alyssa
@mars
@leavefootprintsonmyheart-june27
@lollypop1
@ashleypetrova
@are-you-with-me
21 comments

Like it's her birthday

26 days ago - 2,556 views
Like it's her birthday
Ugh, tomorrow is my birthday So this my last day being 18. I'll be 19 in a few hours, maybe I already am somewhere else because of the time zones:D Anyway, it feels so strange. I mean, that's so old - just imagine next year. I won't be a teenager anymore. Plus, 19 and 17 belong to the most boring years I can imagine. How about you? I know for some it's different because you're adults at 21, but here, we become "adults" at 18.
Anyway, I'm excited for my party:)
Though I don't know what to wear:D
15 comments
'Cause I'm standing still as you leave me now
Seriously, do you like this layout or my usual one better?
And isn't Esti beautiful?!?
16 comments

And I ain't afraid to show it

One month ago - 3,003 views
And I ain't afraid to show it
Sexy and I know it//LMFAO
 
I hope this layout doesn't already belong to anybody!! I tried to do something else, but keep the pictures in it. Please tell me whether you like it or not:)
17 comments

Sets for my 19th birthday (April 21st)

25 items - One month ago - 128 views
Thank you so much for the amazing gifts, you are unbelievably nice:) I love all of them, they're absolutely gorgeous!
4 comments

Are you a Taurus

One month ago - 3,084 views
Are you a Taurus
17 comments

Are you a Taurus?

One month ago - 2,936 views
Are you a Taurus?
Yes, I am one, born on the 21st of April. This would be an outfit I'd wear (if I could afford it, that is). I tried to make it romantic and cool at the same time. And the picture of Behati is in it because someone told me we are a similar type;)
15 comments

Behind blue eyes

One month ago - 89,303 views
Behind blue eyes
Happy Easter everyone!
 
I could tag tons of people in here who mean a lot to me , but I won't do that. The people who are meant to will see this set anyway.
 
So, long time no see or better no write/read. When did I post my last blog set? I can't even remember. Maybe because I didn't want to talk about the things which are wrong or not that good. But a special person on here made me notice one thing (you know who you are): If I'm not there for you, you will hate me. And I'll hate myself for it, too. I already do. Because there's one point. You have always been there for me, at least some of you (again you know who you are). And I might need that again now. And it's plain bitchyy that I didn't fully give that back during the last time. I'm so sorry for that, for not answering messages and such. Not only sorry, I want to apologize for it. I feel horrible for not knowing what's going on. And yes, maybe it would be a distraction from my own problems, to talk to others.
 
So here you go if you even want to read that. There was this boy who I, well, liked. We chatted on Facebook and even wanted to meet. Great, you could say. Yes, it would have been great. But I found out that this was his pattern. I guess he didn't even care about which girl he would date. So, I totally said no and from then, we didn't have contact anymore. And now he has a girlfriend. Ugh, such a cute couple. My first thought was: Oh, how cute. Not. And the second one: This could have been me. Again. I kicked him out of my friends list and everything, but it hurt. I guess it was also my ego.
When it comes to boys and my outward appearance, I have a low self-esteem anyway, I can't help it. There's barely someone who says: Wow, you look great with your hair like that. At least there are no boys who are even interested, it's a different thing with friends. I always think that I won't meet a boy who really likes me. And there are so much more things. I feel like I could cry, though I never do.
 
Then there's this problem wit my "bestie". Well, at least she belongs to my closest friends and we used to hang out a lot together. But she's changing. She won't even come to my party for obviously ridiculous reasons. We don't even talk that much anymore and I don't know what happened or why she acts like that. It gets worse and worse. And I'm sure talking to her wouldn't change that at all.
 
Plus, there are those regular fears, for example school. I'm so afraid of failing that I can't relax, not even during vacations. What if I don't have the grades I need? But... for what exactly would I need them? I want to study, yes, but I don't know which subject and it's just annoying. Being afraid without a real goal... then what's it worth?
 
You see, there are so many questions going round and round in my head and I can't stop them. But writing about it (no matter if anybody reads it or not) helps a bit.
21 comments

I wasn't expecting

One month ago - 3,081 views
I wasn't expecting
Please like this set here, it would be amazing!
http://www.polyvore.com/coachella_daynnight/set?id=46715718
10 comments